In thinking about writing this post, I was going to originally say, “see ‘Why Yoko Can’t Read’ and apply it to music.” But it’s more complicated than that.
Let’s start from the present and work backwards. I have an iTunes account, but I don’t have an iPod. I don’t like listening to music as I’m walking down the street, because I get distracted and I need to pay attention to walking because I’m a klutz. I also don’t listen to music on headphones at work because it’s distracting to me. I share an office with a co-worker, who has vastly different tastes in music, but as a rule, we usually don’t have music playing during work anyway. At home, I share an office with Lipby, and although we share more similar tastes in music, we don’t listen to things the same way. I often like to listen to an album from beginning to end, or listen to random tracks with a common theme. Lipby likes to listen to the same set of songs over and over again. I also don’t listen to music while I’m on the computer anyway (distraction again). The only time I really listen to music nowadays is when I’m in the car, which is 2-3 times a week. And even then, sometimes I’ll listen to NPR instead.
I haven’t bought new music in any form since, gosh, I don’t remember. Late 90s? I’ve been to orchestra/chamber music concerts sporadically, but I haven’t been in a bar listening to a band in about 10 years, I haven’t been to a stadium-sized concert since post-college, I think.
So, why don’t I listen to music? Because I haven’t been moved by any new music put out there in the past ten years? Because silence seems more comforting to me than putting on a CD? Because “background music” is often foreground music to my mind in certain situations because I focus on it to the point that I can’t do anything else? Yeah, maybe all of that.
I’m sure this all sounds weird, coming from someone who calls herself a musician. But since last week, when I discovered that I still derive great pleasure listening to music, it made me think that there is a part of me that does still find music to be nourishing to my soul, and that maybe sometimes it would be good to sit down and listen again– dust off those CDs and see which ones still move me. Maybe it would inspire to me to look for new music again too. And of course, it could only help with creating my own.